These two, and a pair of pants with arrows pointing in so many different directions saying β€œfeet???” underneath em printed all over

Ideal outfit

Subtoot: I am not obligated to have cute chats with you anymore after you say something racist.

β€œNo, I’m not high; why do you ask?” I reply as I stand naked in my kitchen at midnight, eating spoonfuls of peanut butter and jelly directly from the jars

tfw you can overhear your ancap husband in the other room loudly lecturing his friends on discord about how countries with socialized medicine can only do so because the u.s. subsidizes their militaries

:blobconfused:

Gay-owned furniture store idea:

Home O’ Sectionals

The past two weeks have been super stressful for work

Manager: i need you to take on this huge project to appease these customers because we horribly broke the software with the latest service pack
Me: ok
Manager, later: why haven't you been taking calls from the queue, you need to pull your weight
Me: i haven't had a lunch break in a week and a half
Manager: calls calls numbers numbers
Me: i'm very hungry
Manager: Q U E U E

@checkervest @interneteh I grew up only knowing real Vermont red clover honey my whole life, super delicious

Moved out of Vermont, and holy shit, commercial honey is GARBAGE

Except for maybe Florida orange blossom honey, which is legit

@dublynwilde I have thus avoided this by being in Orlando. Cons: instead of beach candy, we have the I-4 Eyesore

@masklayer ah yes

iamveryti.red: now with brown and other more different brown

frick
i go one day
ONE DAY
without washing my lack-of-hair

and i itch like a thousand ants are taking up residence on my head

@TyTheCat Oh lordy, I am not clicking that link because the comments are guaranteed to be a shit quagmire

@sarathsaas Agreed! I love that our feed is truly at our discretion, and not force fed ads and other people’s likes and follows, and is in proper chronological order.

James T. Kirk: pan switch

Jean-Luc Picard: bossy bottom

Kathryn Janeway: The Best Domme You've Ever Had

Benjamin Sisko: really good at quickies

Jonathan Archer: Scott Bakula

FURRIES LISTEN UP

Have you donated money towards ALS in honour of our pal @dogbomb1@twitter.com? Great! Save those receipts, and let @QuotationMarkBB@twitter.com and @BoozyBadger@twitter.com know! They're tracking money raised by the furry community and will do something epic once $20K has been raised!

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i am very tired

Welcome to iamveryti.red! A little Mastodon instance for sleepy peeps, friends both old and new, and other decent folks, run by Jaxen Beaver.

This 18+ instance is meant to be a safe, friendly place for everyone to interact with each other without fear of trolling, antagonism, and discrimination. It's especially friendly for queer and trans individuals, and furries are also welcome!